Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Are we holding back God?


I have been taking a break from seriousness for a while. It has been good. I have had some amazing fellowship time with God, and a lot of fun with my kids. I just needed some light-hearted refreshment.

But I have also been challenged by what is happening in another friend's life. Jaeson Ma, who ministers on the campus of UCLA, has been experiencing the power of God in amazing ways these past two weeks. I look forward to reading his posts each day!!!!! We have been rejoicing with him at what God is doing on his campus. (Read about it at www.jaesonma.blogspot.com)

At the same time, my heart aches for our own campus. Why do we not see this kind of power on our own campus?

Yesterday, I spoke to one of our students who is so close to accepting Christ, but who just will not take that final step. When I left him, I was fighting back the tears and my heart was breaking.

We have two weeks of school left. On May 21st, there are students who will graduate without knowing God personally. I feel so desperate!!!!!

Do we not have enough faith? Are we not praying enough? Sometimes I just want to lay facedown in the square at the center of campus and plead with God for the souls of our students.

Jaeson's words resonate with my heart. Listen to what he says:

"I couldn’t do my regular ministry duties. I could no longer just settle for Church meetings, Bible studies and casual prayer meetings. I wanted something more. There had to be more. I kept reading 1 Corinthians 2 and Acts 4. Paul never preached with human wisdom, human knowledge, he preached with the power of God. Yet, today all we have is human knowledge from our pulpits, but no Holy Spirit power. A Chinese house church leader once visited some major mega-churches in Los Angeles California and when asked, “What do you think? He responded with, ‘It’s amazing what your American Churches can do without the Holy Spirit.” Lord I pray for mercy on Your luke warm Church here in the United States. Last week I read Acts 4 over and over again.

"Now, Lord consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness. Stretch out your hand to heal and perform miraculous signs and wonders through the name of your holy Servant Jesus. After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly. All the believers were in one heart and mind. No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much grace was upon them all." Acts 4:29-33

The apostles preached the resurrection of the Lord Jesus with great power. I am desperate to see that great power at work in my generation. If not, I don’t know what to live on for. I did not sign up for a program, an organization or a religious institution. I found Christ at the age of 17 & was radically changed. He transformed me, encountered me, saved me from going to jail and I have never looked back. But here I am again, desperate as the day I met Him. God where is your power in my generation?

I became so desperate last week. I simply prayed a prayer of Jeremiah 6:16.

“Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”

I lost it. I dropped everything and went back to the place of prayer. For days on end I just sought God’s presence in the morning and through the night. I found rest for my soul. I found His presence and He had become everything once again. The only way I could describe how it felt and how I feel at this moment is this, “completely satisfied and utterly dissatisfied.”

I am completely satisfied in His presence, but I am utterly dissatisfied with the state of Christianity in my generation. Oh God, oh God, oh God…if you don’t do something, I don’t know what else to do? Where are the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in this generation? 40,000 students at UCLA and the majority do not know this glorious presence I know. Millions in my generation are leaving the Church because they have encountered a dead religion instead of encountering the manifest presence of God. I am distraught and God you must do something. I only live for one thing, to see your name lifted High, to see revival come, to experience heaven on earth, if not, take me home. Revival or death! I don’t mean to sound extreme, but this is how I feel."

Preach it, brother Jaeson.

One of my favorite quotes is from C.H. Spurgeon. He says, "If sinners be damned, at least let them leap to Hell over our bodies. If they will perish, let them perish with our arms about their knees. Let no one go there unwarned and unprayed for."

Lord, forgive us for our unbelief. May we know the power at work within us and speak your truth boldly. AMEN.

6 comments:

RMc said...

I'm glad you have taken time to be refreshed. We've been talking in Bible Study about the 10 commandments - specifically the Sabbath most recently. The concept of rest from Hebrews 9 was where we landed. I hope you can continue in that rest.

I have been the pastor of this church for a little over 2 years. Results that I see have been slow in coming - but they are coming. God is showing Himself in the lives of people, making changes that only He can make. That being said, I also need the boldness to speak when and what I need to speak; His power speaking rather than my words being verbalized.

Thanks for the link to Jaeson's blog and the quote from Spurgeon - I needed them.

Joe Kennedy said...

AMEN. Been thinking about that a lot lately too.

David Phillips said...

Kiki,

I've been missing you! I'm glad you've had some fun. I know how you feel, and I have to be honest, I'm worn out from it.

I spent 4 months leading up to Easter inviting, investing, praying, sharing, talking, building relationships...anything I could do to make a difference in the lives of people here in Middletown, DE for the Kingdom. Come Easter...nothing.

Sunday afternoon, I thought back through all that and realized that I had done everything God asked me to do. I was obedient. God is the one who grants the increase. God is the one who builds his church. God is the one who transforms man. And I must rest in his providence. It doesn't make things any easier. It just gives me perspective.

Two weeks out from Easter, I still trust in God to work from my investment and the investments others in our church made. And God will be faithful.

It literally wore me out though. Two weeks later, I'm physically and mentally worn out. But God is doing a great work with us.

Kiki...trust HIM. I know you guys do. Give it all you have and let Him do the rest. And enjoy life. Feed out of the overflow.

Blessings to you and Doug and I can't wait to see you in G'boro!

Tim Sweatman said...

Kiki,

While it is often true that we don't see results because we are working in our own power, sometimes when we work in the power of the Spirit we still don't see results. Consider Jeremiah. He was given the very words he spoke by God, yet people didn't respond to his preaching (well, they responded, but not in a positive way). As Billy Graham once said, "We are not called to be successful; we are called to be faithful." If you are serving faithfully, seeking to do God's will in His power, then you have done all you can and should do. You may not see many results before students graduate, but perhaps when these students move on to another place God has someone waiting there to share Jesus with them, and because you have prepared the soil of their hearts they receive Him. Perhaps these lean times are a test from God to see if you are committed to keep on serving Him and seeking Him even if you never see the big results; He may give the results once you pass the test.

We don't know why two people can serve just as faithfully, can both be working by the power of the Spirit, and one experience amazing results while the other does not. That is one of those mysteries of God's sovereignty that is beyond us. I am glad to see you rejoicing over the way God is moving in your friend's ministry, even though you are not seeing the same results. This shows that you have a true Kingdom mindset.

Kiki Cherry said...

Tim,

Thanks for the great words!!!

But I still also see something in the lives of many of my friends that is lacking in my own.

I'm going to step out on a limb here and sound a little non-Baptist for a minute. But my desire is to discover truth. I want to know God to the fullest extent that I can know Him, and have the greatest impact FOR HIS GLORY in the short time I have on earth.

I am starting to sense that my lack of understanding related to the Holy Spirit plays a part in my powerlessness. I don't say that because someone told me that, but because God has been showing me some things through my own private Bible study time.

What does it mean to have a form of godliness, but deny its power? Why does he say we can do even greater things than these, yet we see so few people truly acting on that power?

Why are there so many passages that speak to the amazing power we have within us, and that we have everything we need for all godliness, yet we so often live in defeat?

I don't know what the answers are to all of that yet. But I am desperately seeking, and praying that God will reveal those deeper things and help me understand the truth.

But one thing I see in the lives of Jaeson and other truly impactful people in my life is that they are TOTALLY sold out for God. They are willing to be absolute fools for Christ and don't care what others think about it.

And they PRAY with such incredible power and authority!!!! They pray OVER other people with such confidence, belief and authority. If they feel God is leading them to pray for someone, they step out in absolute boldness, confidence and authority.

I can't honestly say that I've reached that point yet. To be gut level honest, I sometimes still worry more about the approval of man than the approval of God. I'm ashamed of that. I don't want to be a spiritual chicken any longer.

Tim Sweatman said...

Kiki,

I think you're on the right path to seeing that power at work in your life and ministry. Unfortunately, I can't say that I'm speaking from a lot of personal experience on this, but I have had some tastes of what can happen when we let God truly have all of us.

You already know what the key to unlocking this power is, because you said it: "They are TOTALLY sold out for God. They are willing to be absolute fools for Christ and don't care what others think about it." The hard part is actually getting to that point. The tendency is to simply imitate others so that we can have what they have, but God doesn't usually work that way.

You ask, "What does it mean to have a form of godliness, but deny its power? Why does he say we can do even greater things than these, yet we see so few people truly acting on that power? Why are there so many passages that speak to the amazing power we have within us, and that we have everything we need for all godliness, yet we so often live in defeat?" I believe this is because we want just enough of God to be saved, just enough to have others look at us as being good people, but few of us really want all that God has for us. I sense that desire in you. I don't know what personal barriers you have that are holding you back, but I believe God will enable you to overcome them because you truly are seeking Him.