Apparently the topic of my last few posts struck a chord. I have received emails from several people who feel the same way.Interestingly enough, most of them are missionaries or former missionaries.
There is a Casting Crowns song out right now that speaks volumes. It's called "Stained Glass Masquerade", and is on their Lifesong album.
But these words hit me between the eyes. Here's an excerpt from the song:
Is there anyone who’s been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who’s traded
In the altar for a stage
The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart
But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be
Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay
So what do you think is the answer? Why do we seem to struggle so much to find that genuine connection and transparent fellowship? Do you think it has to do with the individualism and busyness of the American culture? Or is it something else?
11 comments:
What a great song! After reading your post I went to Napster and downloaded the track. I also downloaded "Praise you in this storm" and will probably end up with the whole album. I am a music junkie and can't turn down good music. Thanks for pointing us all to this great song.
Without getting real deep (something I'm not good at anyway), I'd say a big part of the problem is that we're not all the same, all the time. That is to say, "the real me" is different from person to person and from environment to environment. Every person affects me in different ways, and the way I respond to them isn't necessarily artificial, it's just, shall we say, customized, and usually for their benefit, taking into account their likes, dislikes, and how they handle various kinds of commentary and camaraderie.
T'ain't always easy. I do not, for example, relate to fellow former Marines quite the same way I do to my darlin' wife, but both the "Marine Real Me" and the "Husband Real Me" are--well, the real me. But how many people will know both?
I think it takes a whole lot of maturity to really be comfortable with, and accepting of, who we are. We value the opinions of others, about us, and want to hide that which we don't like, or think others won't like.
That's why I love being old. I have really adopted the couch potato motto .. I yam what I yam.
I think part of it, for me, is a strong relationship with Jesus. That was very very hard to get, for me. I was a believer for 25 years before I would say I knew Jesus or loved Him. I just wouldn't equate being saved with knowing or loving, as seems to be all too common today.
Whoops ..
ps: I'm not saying any reader is less than mature, or has a lesser relationship with Jesus. I'm just observing my personal experience.
Not believing in reincarnation, I'm the only person I've ever been.
I have to agree with the comment that I received in an email from a former missionary. He expressed a longing for this kind of fellowship as well, but noted that many American churches have never experienced that, so would not even understand this post.
I think he is absolutely correct. It is such a rare thing to find that "heart" level of community in the Westernized church. Our Philly metro director has some great insights into why that might be, and most of them are tied to American culture.
But as my friend says, "To have tasted it before is all the more difficult. It's not that we've
moved to a different paradigm by choice; it's that once you've tasted that time of intimacy and community, who can be satisfied with anything but?"
Kiki,
We have never met so responding to your questions seems a bit awkward for me. However, because we belong to the same "family" I hope these words will be an encouragment to you.
A verse that has sustained me through many difficult days is Nahum 1:7; "The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble. He knows those who trust in Him." Rest assured that our Father knows you and knows where you are.
I agree that our U.S. culture as well as many other cultures has made it more difficult for us to experience the presence of God in our lives and to truly hear His voice when He speaks to us.
The Christian philosopher Blaise Pascal is quoted as saying, "I have discovered that all the unhappiness of men (and women) arises from one single fact, that they are unable to stay quietly in their room."
We have lost the ability and the practice of solitude. This may sound strange, but I have come to believe that we do not experience geniue fellowship others until we learn how to be completely alone with and content with Jesus. Of course He was a master of this practice.
Matthew 4:1-11; 14:13; 14:23
Luke 6:12
Mark 1:35
I do hope I'm addressing what I understand to be your challenges as described in your recent posts.
Nevertheless, may God grant you strength during these days of refinement.
Guy--
The whole cd is great!!! BTW--I went to that Christian Schwarz website you referenced, and found some more great materials that we can use. You are a WEALTH of resources on church planting!!!!
Dan,Bob and Ken--
Thanks. I appreciate your insights.
James--
I do pray for you guys regularly, and fully understand the struggle. I could sense it yesterday in our whole team, and in the words that came from Philly, too. Which just means that we are heading in the right direction, and need to be guarding/defending/fighting for one another more than ever. Thanks for having my back. Love you guys.
Ken,
I agree with you about the practice of solitude. We simply don't do it often enough.
My husband also gave me some wise insight yesterday as we were discussing all of this. He said that he has noticed a marked difference in me over the past few months, as I've gotten into the blogging world and into reading more contemporary Christian books.
I'll start my day right--in the Word of God--knowing who I am and confident of my calling and place.
But then as if in the course of the day I get on the blogs, or into one of the books that are currently on the market, it just becomes increasingly confusing, and it greatly affects me.
Some of the stuff being written on blogs right now--from the posts to the comment section--is just wrong. The ugliness in the church has been exposed, and to be honest--I'm tired of reading it.
Someone even went by my parent's house, trying to get them to influence me to help gather dirt on a certain Baptist leader.
I WANT NO PART OF THAT. I don't believe that those tactics are the Christlike way of dealing with problems in our convention.
Doug also advised me not to listen to the voices pushing their dogmatic agendas. If it's not for the glory of the Lord, and for reaching the nations, and if it goes against what God HIMSELF has shown me through His word and confirmed through other legitimate sources, then I don't need to hear it.
I have a wise husband. And he's right. I've listened too much to the voices that say I'm not right with God if I.........don't believe in Calvinism...don't feel called to homeschool.....teach our mixed groups of college students occasionally (at the request of both my husband and supervisor)....believe that the Holy Spirit, as God, can still give people today the ability to speak in tongues if He so desires....don't believe Charismatics are evil, and cooperate with many of them in our ministry.....believe that the laity can baptize/administer the Lord's Supper, etc.
I've given too much deference to the positions of "authority" that certain men hold, when I know the truth of what the Ultimate Authority has spoken to me personally.
So I won't be reading many of the blogs, and am staying away from some of the "latest" books on the market. I'll still be reading the blogs on church planting, and those of a couple of friends who stay away from the really negative stuff.
In my QT, one of the books I'm currently reading through is Psalms. Yesterday I read chapter 116. Here's what the portion that really spoke to me:
v. 4-14. "Then I called on the name of the LORD: "O LORD, save me!"
The LORD is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion.
The LORD protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me.
Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the LORD has been good to you.
For you, O LORD have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the LORD in the land of the living.
I believed, therefore I said, "I am greatly afflicted." And in my dismay I said, "All men are liars."
How can I repay the LORD for all his goodness to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the LORD. I will fulfill my vows to the LORD in the presence of all his people."
Doug has indeed given you wise counsel. I started a draft blog post a couple of weeks ago entitled, "Blogging can be hazzardous to your spiritual health". The theme of the blog was focused on much of what you have just stated. There is a balance between knowing what is happening around us and overloading on the negative. I believe what you have described can be summed up in Philipians 4:8
"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honorable, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."
BTW my blog focuses on missions and church planting ;-)
Kiki,
Perhaps I should say AMEN, or double AMEN, to your original post and subsequent comments, and leave it at that. Yet, that seems superficial. :~)
I keep reading your blog because I appreciate your authenticity and transparency. Good words on the lack of and need for real community. I heartily commend you for your stand expressed in your 6:07AM comment. Your blog provides something predictable (in the very best sense of the word) -- real encouragement and the testimony of someone fighting the good fight. I deeply appreciate you, your family, your blog, and your ministry!
We have reached the same conclusion concerning blogs!!! Last year I was reading a multitude of them (not gonna mention a number, cuz, well, just cuz) I now read very sparingly, and just hit the highlights of different ones - none consistently. My dissatisfaction started well before the big show earlier this summer. I agree, you have a wise husband.......
On reading new books, I tend to try to read many - but not from the necessarily "popular" authors that everybody else reads.
I like the Casting Crowns album you wrote about. Several songs are appropriate.....
I wish I knew the answer to your original question though. Am struggling with that issue in the church I pastor. Most folks have known each other for forever, and the new folks have a hard time being a part unless they start something new altogether.
I have a feelling that the enemy of our souls has a major hand in the mix, leading us to believe that what we are doing is the real deal, rather than a poor, pathetic substitute.
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