If you want a perspective-stretching exercise, related to my last post, then go to the blog search engine, and google "grew up Southern Baptist", "former Southern Baptist", or "in a Baptist church."
It's a little disturbing to read some of those stories, and how many of our youth who walked an aisle and were baptized still have no idea what it really means to have a relationship with God.
I did that little exercise this morning, and even found some former SBCers now immersed in Wicca, paganism, universalism, and all kinds of eastern mysticism. There are also some who are pretty bitter at God, and some sad stories of church abuse. A couple of preacher's/missionary kids, too.
DISCLAIMER: a couple of the sites had raw content, so proceed with caution.
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11 comments:
What are you saying? SBC's problems are solved by changing their view on baptism to one more like HHBC? What you said stretches logic--go back to worrying about pets!
--former SBC pet owner
Wow. There is a whole lot of assumption in your statement. As I stated in the previous post, what I wrote was NOT about a position on the HHBC situation, but rather a call to be sensitive, loving, and Christlike in the way this issue is approached.
In the "stretching" post, I'm encouraging people to step out of their church culture,and really seek to understand the perspective of those outside. I think if most Southern Baptists truly knew the perception a majority of America has about the church and our God, it would shock them.
But we can't be relevant and reach a lost America without even seeking to understand the context they live in. We are SPIRITUALLY ARROGANT.
We need to step out of our little Christian bubbles, and do more LISTENING!
The question has been asked: why are young people leaving our churches? Why are we failing to reach such a huge segment of society?
The answer is right in front of our faces. Read their blogs!!! They are not hiding their reasons for leaving the church!!!
My point was that we have numerous cases of people who have been baptized biblically, but who don't have a clue what it meant and are as lost as a goose. THAT SADDENS ME!!! How can these kids have sat under Baptist teaching year after year, and yet totally failed to find God?
There is a problem with the way we are doing church!!! And a lot of it has to do with failing to love, honor, and respect each other within the body of Christ. Of course the next generation is not going to listen to what we teach, if they don't see it having much bearing on the way we live and relate to one another.
We also have people in our culture who HAVE genuinely accepted Christ,but haven't grown because we've immediately thrown up barriers. They are desperately seeking a safe place where they can be discipled and taught the foundations of their faith, but can't find that genuine community.
There is nothing wrong with healthy, honest evaluation. And the church needs it.
I appreciate that Henderson Hills has raised these issues, because it reflects an honest attempt to evaluate where they are. Their leadership and lay people have been having "iron-sharpening-iron" discussions, and honestly seeking ways to do a better job of reaching and discipling people for Christ.
THEY HAVE NOT EVEN COME TO A DECISION YET. THEY HAVE SIMPLY BEEN DISCUSSING A VALID ISSUE, ASKING SOME VERY PERTINENT QUESTIONS, AND ARE BEING ASSASSINATED FOR IT!!!
Would you rather be part of a church that assumes it has "arrived", or a church who is courageous enough to ask questions that will challenge, stretch and grow them?
Go back and review the many ways your blog comes off as pious & judgemental toward churches. Doesn't sound to me like you have much of the love you are talking about when people don't fit your ideal. I'd rather not be in your church, too much whining.
Anonymous,
Ouch! While that hurt a little, you make a valid point.
I guess we all have our blind spots, and I forget that those reading my blog are sometimes only seeing one side of my life.
I probably DO need to be careful of sounding "whiny." I'll keep that in mind.
I often write when I'm struggling with an issue, because it helps me work through my own thought process, and I get feedback/perspective other than my own.
There are some more positive posts, though--in my archives. Especially about our students and my kids. They are amazing!!! And there are stories that I wish I could share, but can't because of the confidentiality of them.
This has been a tough season, and I guess that comes out at times.
However--I am who I am, and I'm still on this journey, too. I'm a transparent person, and very, very human. I have weak points in my life, too.
I realize I have a long ways to go, and a lot to learn. But I desire more than anything to make the most of the time that I have here, to see Christ glorified in the nations, and finish strong.
Thanks for the rebuke, though. I'm listening.
Pro 15:31-33 "He whose ear listens to the life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.
He who neglects discipline despises himself, But he who listens to reproof acquires understanding.
The fear of the LORD is the instruction for wisdom, And before honor comes humility."
DOUG and KIKI,
I have to assume anonymous is not a Brother or Sister in CHRIST. I love your WITNESS for CHRIST and sharing your HEART for the LORD. My GOD continues to BLESS your Ministry. I will send another e-mail for your Home Address. Did you get your Pet Yet?
Your Brother in CHRIST
Kiki, just for the record, I would like to say that I have never considered your posts to be whiny in any way. You strike me as someone who really has a heart for lost and hurting people. What you write exudes love and positivity. I am inspired by it regularly. Concerning your evaluation of church culture, it seems to me that it is critical. The church cannot be self-satisfied and expect to help a dying world. Lots of people think of Southern Baptists as being arrogant and unloving people. We are perceived to be all about exclusivity. We are best known for what we are against. We certainly are not known as a group of loving people. Now we know that all this is not really true. But we have to recognize the criticism and examine what about it is true or what we are doing that makes it appear to be true. That means we LISTEN, as you said. We need to quit having arguments with one another and show real love for our brothers and sisters. How will anyone believe that we love the lost, when it is very clear we do not really even love each other.
KIKI,
I've discovered a couple of things after years of life and ministry. One is to never take anyone writing criticism as "anonymous" seriously. "Consider the source" is a prerequisite for receiving rebuke or correction. That's impossible here. My suggestion is "forget it". Every minister has to learn this lesson to effectively lead people and you are a true minister.
The other thing I've learned is people who write anonymously usually have poor relationship skills and, out of fear generally, cannot attach their name to criticism AND again, generally, cannot relate with love and respect in person.
You say .."how can you know this?"
After fifty years of ministry, forty of those pastoring, I've experienced LOTS of letters and notes of anonymous criticism and, when some of those repented and asked me to forgive them, and some did that, they confessed to the things I've mentioned.
Other times someone would find out about the authors of such notes and would tell me to forget it because the person was the kind of individual I've described.
I realize there may be circumstances where anonymity is necessary in communication but, IMHO, never when it is criticism.
By the way, your personal transparancy is refreshing and is not "whiny" in my opinion. "Anonymous" would have no way of knowing since the inability to deal with true emotions is lacking in most such persons who criticize anonymously, though I cannot obviously know this one individual's situation.
Also, your husband's question of "anonymous" deserves an answer of him/her and applause from me.
Paul Burleson
Kiki,
Your posts have never come across as pious and judgemental. Your posts are always reflective of what God is doing in your life. Paul Burleson is exactly right. Don't pay any attention to "anonymous".
I know constructive criticism can help us grow, but what "anonymous" wrote was just rude.
KIKI,
Marty is usually right on when he speaks, but, contrary to a "Glamour shot" perspective that's me on my "worst" day. :)
Paul Burleson
Kiki,
I wouldn't go so far as to say that anonymous made a valid point, as you did in your response to his/her second comment. But knowing you, I'm not surprised at your gracious and humble response. Of course you're human and have areas that you need to work on, but his/her description of the attitude you display on your blog doesn't even come close to reality. And not suprisingly, he/she did not respond at all to what you actually wrote. Apparently the strategy is "if you can't refute someone's position, just attack them." It seems to be a common strategy within the "church," but one that has no place within any group that bears the name of Christ.
The unpleasant truth is that your initial comment is correct (it would make a great post itself). Unfortunately, some people do believe that they have all the answers and that anyone who disagrees with them is "whining" or compromising with the world. As many of us have learned over the past year or more, growing and stretching and seeking to understand the truth are much harder and more painful than just accepting everything we've been told. It also threatens those who think they are right about everything, which is why they are so vicious in their opposition and criticism.
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